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Carolina G. Is The Masseuse Party 2-A

Updated: Jul 14, 2021

- Carolina G.-


The Masseuse

Part 2


Caroline Garcia


Hey! Thanks so much for reading part 1 of this two part series, where I told you about my life and how I found my purpose.

With this part, I hope to convey a clear vision of solutions in regards to some pretty serious and necessary social results. I believe we can help make things wonderful. And by “Wonderful” I mean, to have a home free of fear from not having food or the basic necessities of living. As well as free from abusers. A physical home as well as a mental home.

When I told you how I had to learn about myself in order to face the world around me with a peaceful mind, I hope it made you also aware of the power you too poses over your mind. Now that I’m ready to believe in myself enough to believe I can communicate a truly necessary process of separation and correction; because it is unloving to simply abandon another. I have learned that we must care enough to make an effort to help abusers see themselves and their hurtful actions.

So, step one is looking at ourselves. Step two, believing in our ability to do what needs to be done. I believe we are being systematically abused in various social ways and in order to truthfully and fully observe and identify whom our abuser is, we MUST learn to be better. Evolve. I believe “perfection” of anything. Which isn’t possible if one doesn’t truly believe perfection is possible let alone an existent level to achievement. We can and must become wiser. And the wisest one (perfect one) resides within us all at all times. Accessible to anyone… at any time.

It’s been a crazy type journey in this life. Seems the more I observe our surroundings, the more I see how I can help make things better for those in need. Having a purpose in life motivates me! Pushes me to do better at staying focused on the focus of utilizing and sacrificing my best work each day in all ways. Even during relaxation and vacation time. The best work to do is creating positive spaces within ourselves at all times. Because the high likelihood of it turning out to be the best feel good work to be tired from doing, is imperative.

In this book, we’re taking it to the next level. It all stems deeply in association with why I began writing “a book” in the first place. Why I plunged myself into the dark ledge of speaking the truth about some pretty embarrassing and private events and situations in regards to how I was raised and decisions I’ve made with my life. I’ll tell you now, to “work” is worth your life. It’s a “self-therapy.” A beautiful flower living where it is. The flower lived for itself until it was chosen to live for another and then depart. The departing would have happened regardless of being picked or not. So the point of the choice is in perspective and understanding surroundings, behaviors and choices. It’s all in how you see things.

The point of writing this book is to express a process of picking oneself up and learning to walk again. Learning to have love for ourselves and others. To give us each an ability to walk with more peace of mind and a solid life lived with a joyful purpose for positive and unselfish desires. Understanding and accepting not all are able, nor will choose to be unselfish and the point is to love one another regardless of being loved back. To live as a flourishing individual within each and every one of our communities.

I’ve laid out plans on how to heal some of the most abused people in our existence and how we can help their abusers at the same time as stopping the abuse because the best way to stop an abuser isn’t to kill them but to heal them from the initial reason they’ve become abusive towards another in the first place. Which generally happens after someone abused them and they are now abusing themselves along with others.

Remember, being separated for “correction” doesn’t need to be another form of abusing someone for “what they’ve done”. Because as we know, if hurting others is pleasing to you, then ‘not hurting others’ hurts you. So if not hurting others is painful, and being a good servant to yourself means you’d need to hurt another, this means you’ve become tied and bound to an upside down mind and you are slowly but surely hurting your very own spirit. Trapped, smothering internally. Truly believing life is lived for the goal of “getting” and not giving, is a very slow internal death indeed. This is the difference between a heart of service and a heart not of service. Yes, it is in fact one or the other in this case.

So I thank you again for existing. Let’s get to work.


Mental Massage -

Internal Healing –

Dear Other Me –

The Masseuse Technique -

Ideas -

My Spa Paradise Church -

Helping Homes -

Healthy Touch Homes –

Don’t Tremble

Don’t wince

Don’t laugh

When we fret for pence

Don’t be a category five

Or a Category seven

Cause we’re nothing till alive

And we’re something more than driven

We’re a passenger being driven

Or a driver of the Flames

Oh we’re burning

On our own

We can burn our very home


They gotta know we gotta drift and sift

Sifting through the rubble of our hearts

Once the category ten nuclear bomb has detonated

Only happily we lose

Our minds they cannot see

But who looks more and more


Crazy for feeling so

Feeling, something only those who can feel, will ever know

So be thankful for the ability some can never grow

But still bound to love

Crazy is as crazy does

Crazy Love

Chapter: All in Thoughtfulness

Once I finally believed in my massage abilities, I continued to search for a possible home for my wilting willow tree to be planted. Though the leaves were drooping and the green had seemingly left. I held on to the dream, the goal, and the dwindling ambition. My searches proved to not be fruitless. I found a newly forming establishment. After spending seven months at home with my new baby, I was able to go back to work with a newly evolved frame of mind. I learned how to truly form bonds with clients and formulated the mastery of my massage formula.

I looked back and remembered all the people I gave less than exemplary massage work to and had to find forgiveness in myself for not doing my very best work. For not being my truest self. The way I understand it is just as I was so interested and passionate about helping people by healing their aching bodies via massage, I’d better be ready to stay strong by understanding my mind is mine to enslave. And I must use it to serve others as well. Even when I’m exhausted or working through pain of an acceptable level. I demand and command and push this body to render dedicated work filled with real love. Even if I think someone is looking to disrespect my work or become generally unprofessional somehow. I do not have to be unkind.

Because Love starts from within.

I’ve learned to stay ready, in the way that I can respond to people in the best possible manner that will benefit them, not hurt them. I must work at attempting to be non-offensive in my word choices, because that takes effort. Especially for my adolescent side, my ’smart elec” (or as my grandpa called me “smart ass,”) side. I had to recognize and mature away from this way of responding. I let go of being defensive. Simply put, I’m bound by a command. Therefore my views are molded by a strategic and unbelievably powerful force. Some do not believe they have the same force or that this force doesn’t care about them, and that’s a pretty scary thought. But more, I think people are simply jaded by the misuse and perversion of the word or words used by many people in leadership positions of the service industry. Be it religion or another form of “service”.

The words we use, maintain meanings with regards to many aspects and can be misunderstood at any moment. So forgive them and renew you and your mind. Your mind is strong yet can also become your own enemy at times. So love it for what it is, don’t be afraid of what it might be or how it might control your actions. Be strong in the knowledge that it was created for YOUR ‘greater good’ and to serve the goodness within YOU. Because YOU are so important to all of US who are here with you.

We can clearly see how the use of words will either inhibit or coerce our very views, and thoughts. Our views internal and external, are exactly how we navigate this world, as well as the world within. Even blind people hold and maintain views of their own. Because it’s the sight of how one sees themselves within this place that we each individually exist, however together, which deems what we have become.

Though a single ‘wall’ can divide us from being able to physically see each other, we maintain a knowledge that others exist.

The physical body is like a system of lakes and rivers within ourselves, just as the states of our mind and spirit are. We are the care takers of those internal lands. If our internal rivers and lakes are not diverted to the proper drainage and disposal areas, they will ALL begin running over and or flooding other areas of our “lands”. Making mud and sludge, quick sand everywhere. Stagnation.

Some people get trapped within their heads, from their very own uncontrolled systems. Tortured and desperate, dying slowly. Yearning to be helped, to get out or wishing, hoping and praying that somehow, maybe even someone might stop by to help them out of this suffering sand. And you can! I can! WE can!

Unlock that state of petrification in process and progress. Halt the hardening of hearts. DO NOT become one of the people whom no longer feel things or care about things the way a healthy minded individual does. I speak from experience. I was once the undisciplined, under achiever, weak in my undefined purpose. Uninspired. Unhappy with myself and un-goal oriented. Often uncertain, which reflected in my life habits of changing jobs and relationships, often. Never finishing my projects. I was very successful at failing partially or just falling short.

But I’m glad I went through it all, because I can tell you with all knowledge from experience that we must stay long enough to become successful, in all things we begin to care for. DO not leave any options open. Identify with a mentor or role model. I chose as my mentor, Jesus (Yahushua) the Christ. But not until after I turned against him. Just like the apostle Peter.

We each must stop looking for the ‘quick fix’ and be ready to work hard and choose to not want any breaks. Remember something. “Luck” is for those who do not understand the concept and mental relief (peace of mind – grace) of standing with God’s will. Luck is for those who do not know whom blesses them. Use Sensory vision and practice looking at yourself and others. Practice seeing what you know is loving and maintain a want for making those things become a reality and work toward changing the things you can change to be better and grow in love and harmony with that spirit.

Be an achiever and refuse to identify with accepting failure! Because failure only happens when you stop working toward the goal. Even moving a small inch IS progress.

Stop dwelling in the failed past. Do not convince yourself that you’re still the same old you, as you once were, in that old seed laying field of failed growth. Know you have changed, if even only in the tiniest way. Be practical and methodical by assessing your goals one by one, then pull toward yourself, a small piece of work to devour with confidence and focus. Self-discipline is a choice, so choose to use it. Don’t start out by trying to run a marathon after being a smoker for 20 years, start easy, with small goals to accomplish. This way you’re guaranteed to finish what you began, and then move onto bigger goals.

Eventually you’ll grow into the daily habit of living with purpose and achievements as the tires on your life’s car maintain air, because the less air, the harder it is for that car to roll.

The only difference between you and those who look down on you, is their beliefs. They believe they can fail, and they believe that you are beneath them but you walk in a knowing. Knowing that you will succeed by planning and organizing. Be practical and methodical. Remember that you are living in the positive process of not looking down on anyone, because those who look down, can fall and hurt themselves from “way up there.” Create ways for those things that seem unpractical, to become possible. Focus your attention. Sacrifice yourself via resisting the want to sleep extra, push your need for rest out just a little further, know that eventually when you do relax it’s gonna be very well deserved. TV time, leisure, and chill zones are rewards for short periods of ease and recuperation. Use these small things as your first rewards of positive immediate satisfaction of having been disciplined.

Develop your patience. It is the foundation to self-discipline. Accept that you will not give up. Not ever. This is true commitment, like a marriage. But towards your goals. Be good to yourself, speak kindly to your inner child, remember that you are your own parent and be the parent you’d want to know is raising your very own child. Being you and loving yourself is a commitment both necessary and detrimental. Accomplishment takes time. Time is your friend and be willing to wait. Do not waste your time though. However do give yourself some breaks on occasions. Do not give up, learn to be relentless and very stubborn. Always go back to work and even if you are upset that you felt you’d wasted some precious time in the past, don’t live in that regret. Look upon it and forgive yourself for it. Bandage it and heal it.

Work a little harder this time to make up for anything. Let the difficulty of your past occurrences be the things that you love and appreciate by seeing them as the weights you now utilize to train your most useful mental muscles. The mind of a disciplined person is different from that of the failing person who accepts misery where they are, instead of seeing their surroundings as the place to “come up out from.” Begin to be uncomfortable in that usual comfort zone. Become excited to learn how to implement your thoughts and actions in becoming better, becoming the best you have ever been on a steady path of growth toward successfulness.

Because success is knowing you are getting better daily.

Write down what you want to see come from your success. Example: I want to stop hurting people with my inability to control my word usage and attached emotions. I want to know that I’ve also made a great effort to help others strive to reach this “well off,” space of being. Because I make an effort by practicing unselfishness and sometimes allow myself to view others as my very own children too. Because “if I have God in me and everyone is God’s child, then me and them are my children too.”

Make self-assessments and list things in complete honesty. Stop leading a life of quiet desperation or loud complaining. Use your mind, love your enemy, recognize that yes, the brain is “Satan” but if it’s here and you know all things here are created by God, whom is within you, speaking the truth to your understanding and it’s all for a good reason, make it work for you. The mind is not evil but it has the ability to motivate us receivers to be negatively charged, and then we can choose whether to spread that about. Creating more negativity by passing it onto someone else. And that IS “evil’! Remember, we cancel it out from within. By understanding that somehow and for some reason, its presence is actually a positive thing and though we might not see the reason at the exact moment of being questioned, the fact still stands. Is it possible that existence itself, the fact of being, could be a negative fact for negative reasons? Yet we are created and do exist, therefore we are a positive force by nature.

Destruction cannot destroy destruction. What came first, the destruction (the negative)? Or the creation (the positive)? Of course destruction can’t destroy things that aren’t there. Therefore we can agree to deduce with full logical thought, that “positivity” is the thing that created “destruction,” into existence in the first place. So we can know, through this thought process, it is possible all negatives could be viewed as a positive. Because the negative occurrence or thing in existence, in question, would have nothing to destroy without positivity first existing. Negativity needs positivity in order to exist, however positivity actually could existence alone. So God, being only positive, (perfect love) actually could exist as being just that. Only Love. God is not both love and hate. As so many believe.

The action of destruction is not negative unless it is destroying the positive. Though ‘it’ is in itself cannot live to destroy positive. It respects it and stands still with the force holding them together. If positivity is God. The epicenter of sanity, the creator? Then nobody sane views the dying of the body as a ‘product of proof’ that the creator of creation, and of “us” is ‘wrong. Imperfect and negative. Recognizing that death is a part of living. Because intelligence is accepting that “negativity,” the existence of the opposite of a thing, in this example, proves existence. I explain this because I’ve witnessed how some people believe “it’s all an illusion”. But let me say it here and now. It’s not. It’s here, we’re here with it. We must work to be the force that exposes imperfection (evil). This is how we free ourselves of fear and our own ability to prey upon ourselves.

Understanding these words are not always nouns, “we,” humans, genetic organisms, from the beginning or “abiogenesis,” were perfectly created to parish and not live on. For a good reason. We are all here together, and we are all, each individually, “the life.” We are the living life within the organism. We give our self-biodegrading suits, the body; but we are the “power” here within controlling it. Decision making abilities are a power.

Though external influence is a part of our necessary lesson tools list. We maintain the inevitable awareness of “here and now”. Even when we see the now, as negative. The thought either makes you feel positive, or negative. This indicator of which one is which happens by the charge exuded within. To feel the difference between negative and positive. TO know the difference is to maintain the power. Therefore “within” must first ‘comprehend’.

This is why Jesus told his mind (Satan) in the desert, three times that “it” is to OBEY the Lord Thy God.” He meant the body must obey the one alive within it. He took command over his body, his stomach, his brain. He knew that he is controller of his mind and in that moment he was working to train that brain to do as he demanded. And he commanded that it obey God the creator of the spirit whom he is and not the body itself.

Motivation must come from within, just as fear does. Don’t allow anger to pervade, move through it. Or it will become a crippling emotion which turns into stumps on your success path. Patience, drive and skill are learned behaviors, but just because you might not have had parents or teachers who instilled these skills into you as a child, know the truth! You’ve got THE CREATOR within you! Accessible always. Though it’s tempting to feel those whom seem to be attempting to do wrong by you, are NOTHING but dumbbells at your gym of success, we must also be thankful for those whom are heavy. Choose to no longer hold anger for them, because those weights are not yours to carry around. Again, be thankful to them for being your weights for the time that they were, and now that time has passed or will eventually pass.

For whomever weighs you down only makes you stronger.

Remember this; when your negative thoughts control your actions, is when you have become “demon possessed.” This is a real thing because many people are controlled by their compulsions of fearful thoughts. Yet the term “demon possessed” is exceptionally old. Still, the factuality of the action is present today.

Rid those negative emotions attempting to control your actions of doing either nothing, rendering you deep in sorrow, upset or good old fashioned unhappy. Focus that energy instead on placing it into the proper place that it should be used in. If you’re in bed right now and know that you just feel tired all the time and want to sleep and it’s basically because you are unhappy, REACH! Reach over for a pen and begin writing. Write in this book! List what you love about yourself. Write down just one simple goal for the next hour that you would not normally do, just to get yourself out of bed.

I believe “Getting out of the ghetto,” is not the solution. Healing the ghetto from the inside out, is. Why? Because to simply save ourselves and leave others there to suffer, won’t cure the deep sorrowful mentality of abusing one’s self? I believe in living on the front lines, in the line of fire. I do not abide separatism beyond creating healthy boundaries. God will put me and you where he wants us to be. Your ability to believe is your most powerful ability. Though some call it gullibility or worse. We who ‘believe’ are the people who ‘can’ use their imagination to work for them. The nerves respond to the imagination.

Create a big picture of where you see your success can possibly bring you to. For example: While I was suffering greatly from the thoughts of being sad from having lost full custody of two of my three children, (at the exact same time) I had to focus on not feeling defeated. I’d think about where we will be in the future, in order to not cry during my massage sessions. I’d see myself talking about my book and its success with news anchors or on a talk show with a host. And then my thoughts would move onto my book instead of lingering in the pain of "right now". Something I ‘did have’ at home to work on. I’d think about its approach and what I was trying to achieve with this message to people.

Identify your purpose. Pray for ideas on what you should do. The only difference between a successful person and a person who has settled in their self-created mediocrity, is the belief that you lack self-ability and have no ability to achieve, thereby crippling your own ability to self-motivate and work for those things you can in fact hold in your mind as acceptable and not acceptable. Effort is a mind frame. Belief is the foundation of created efforts.

Find out ‘why’ you exist.

I hope to help others come through their own struggles by learning what I’ve come through and how I found my own purpose through what felt like immense struggles sometimes and people attempting to tear me down. And how you can find yours too. Recognize you are far from ‘helpless’. It is YOU who will bring you out of your ordeal by choosing the proper power of trust which is within. God is in you but only you can ask for his help. And that is the only true way YOU can save yourself. By asking Christ to save you from yourself. Like one of my favorite childhood songs says, “One step at a time with Jesus by my side.” Psalty the Singing Song Book

Basing your mind on wishful thinking is not going to create lasting success. It must be a real and ‘true to reality’, foundation that pushes you. A wish is what you think you want. But to want for God’s will to be done is a want for what God already has planned for you, and that's the best want to maintain. Without knowing the plan or depending solely upon the spirit of love we are walking in faith through a dark space in time. A belief brings standing. Strength “to do”. Wishing is a dizzy practice that will spin you around and around.

Forgiveness and compassion are strength for those whom know the truth of why those foundations are strong, because they are the ability to let go and keep on going. Yet those who think them to be weaknesses usually hold onto anger, hatred or revenge seeking actions. Or simple “indifference”. Leaving themselves in a negative energy and backwards kind of living. Always dizzy. My mentor (Christ) handled everyday life quite perfectly. So my goal is to learn to copy his behaviors and attempt to mimic as closely as I can. He handled stress and difficult relationships knowing he would leave this place beaten down, hanging on a cross. His mind couldn’t make him angry at anyone though, it could have. But it didn't. He was committed to truth and Love in all his day to day interactions. The first foundation confirmed the reasoning behind the ability. Now, give yourself three nice deep breaths.

Breathe out slowly and feel calm.

Don’t worry about what might be going on around you and try not to be waiting for anything in this moment. Think about the fact that you are going to be walking away from this book, so much better, so much more ready, prepared and able, because you will feel differently. You will see with an ability to know that he can pull your foot from that internal quick sand, he can pull your entire body out. Let him begin working on diverting your internal flow of waters to the proper channels through prayer and surrender. Easing flooded areas with seeds growing beautiful and lush gardens for you to feast upon, and share with others.

To comfort them through. To help them too. In your own way.

Be positive and know that your time here in life with us, is wonderful and beautiful and we want you and love you so very much! We want you to be happy, healthy and chillin on a cool mountain peak, overlooking the amazing internal sunset. Now, let’s go! Let’s have this good space of time. And if you’re asking why I use the word “we,” instead of ‘I’, it’s because all of those who follow in one direction, are walking as one member. And those people KNOW they are here together. We know who to look to, and whom to invest our valuable trust in. The most valuable purchase we each make is from within.

Trusting in the positive as an existent force, understanding the scientific process, and the fact that only positive and negative currents exist, and truly YOU are one of us. Though I’m speaking on subjects of spirit, it’s about what you and I can understand as spirit beings walking in human form, and how we’ve been brought through life, making me who I am, and you who you are. And how we now apply these understandings to our daily lives and work. Specifically for me, my work of healing people, and serving people and how they apply to us in the physical realm.

Since I can remember myself as a young child, I’ve enjoyed people. Always working to make people laugh or be impressed by my physical child strength. At nine years of age, my aunt being not so lengthy, would often let me pick her up and then we’d laugh together at how strong I was for my age. But really I just wanted to impress people. I find I still maintain some semblance of this desire in my work. I work to impress each and every one of my recipients. But massage is not just about giving a good massage. It’s about caring for the full wellness of another beings mind, body and spirit. All at once. It’s about sharing the fulfillment of who you are by working at being who you were meant to be while you’re here.

Let’s focus on reality. On being alive and doing things while we’re alive here with each other, because many times we don’t understand how unrealistic the subjects we are allowing to flow within us, may be. Things that have nothing to do with reality because our minds are quite powerful. The power resides with belief and practice. Still if you know your mind is powerful, don’t resort to fearing it, resolve to controlling it, because it belongs… to you.

When I stopped watching TV, I was able to find so many more productive things to do with the time and my mind began to change on its own. And now that I’ve come out of that phase of allowing zero TV time because now if I choose to watch TV, I know exactly why and I’m aware of all things I’m seeing on that screen. And instead of just being a ‘receiver’ of influences, I’m having internal conversations about those things. I generally enjoy watching things that I feel are educational or interesting on a psychological level. Truly we all have the ability to slay all those things called illusions. Slay those thoughts or internal words that we know are not positive. Slay them with positive words and demands of refusal. Your mind is yours, so take responsibility of it and direct it toward creating results in your life that will be obvious rewards.

“The body”, is only the keyboard of your computer, hard drive is your brain, and you are the writer. So treat your body as you would a computer to do well. A good work of the force of goodness urging from within. The most disciplined obedience. Take care of it like a work vehicle. Respect it enough by caring for it and staying focused on reality. With acceptance of the reality that many people do not care or respect ‘being here’ let alone the vehicle given while here. Though the minority of us do. And though people may choose to only focus on selfish desires and would find no interest in doing as you and I do. We must keep in mind this fact places them, in a whole different world. And though they may also view their body as being something more important than a company vehicle, we must lead by example.

We must harmonize our mind, body and spirit with positive actions, thoughts and cravings. We must know our daily battle lays in changing ourselves, in becoming our best selves. We all know when we are doing our best. We all have the ability to be honest with ourselves and so that is the most imperative practice we must develop first. To be honest with ourselves, requires we practice truth all around us.

Love is real as you are, listen closely to you describing what you believe this reality is. An illusion? Nope. You’re ‘you’ and real so you need to get to work, because there are many people waiting for your help from your special abilities and talents. Stop ridding yourself of thoughts, and think hard about what you need to do. Make lists, get organized, focused and prioritize. Then get to work. Get to it. You got this.

Chapter: Mental Massage

The greatest part of massage is artistry. Art is like religion has always been… personal. Not everyone can value a specific “piece” or part of a piece, but the existence of the piece’s importance is generally based upon personal beliefs, weighed or valued by the eyes of the beholder. You become the scale. The way you value will rise and peak through having personal knowledge of or to, the artist.

Love is art. But one must believe in “truth AND love” in order to practice the daily conquering of all forms of hatred, starting from within. Working to not become a part of nor serve it to another or ourselves. Hatred is like a seeping, moving glob of dark destruction and if it touches you and YOU aren’t strong in your stance of living in love and truth, it will overtake your mind, body and obedience to it will ensue. Quickly. Making you hurt yourself and others in many clever ways. The path is wide tremendous and its favorite way to destroy, is to make you hurt those you love the most and then keep them away from you by making you keep yourself away from them.

But to see this truth clearly, one must hold an image an idea in the mind, of an “all Loving being.” A base for comparison. Kind of in the same way that we each must individually decide upon the importance of a piece of art, beyond the dependence of another stating that it holds such and such value because then it would become their idea and not uniquely yours. Which would mean your personal relationship with “it”, is dependent upon another’s view. In this way, we can know the value because it’s all in how you hold it.

Many people hold Buddha and all his known practices, words and or actions, as a part of their lives. They may or may not live completely in replication to his level of “Zen.” But they do follow in that direction, attempting to think and act as he did. And though this man maintained many positive practices, I do not personally agree and so choose not to follow. Yet, I recognize the gentility and peace those whom practice the teachings of aspects of that religion are attempting to achieve and I see them with love. I can love them regardless of my personal choice. I appreciate who people are, not who they wanna be like. In my observation on the behavior of people via personal interaction or pass by interpretations, documentaries, public television, radio shows etc., as well as my own life. I notice people lead people, societies and religions, love aspects of existence instead of people. Valuing negative things, fallible things. Valuing 'things’ above people is a form of worship. Worship of a fallible god is a practice of using your existence in a false way. Therefore the results will only push your existence backwards and away from joy, peace and happiness. Obey Love because it won’t render outcomes of fear, pain, imprisonment, control or slavery. Though I’m happy to belong to God, it is always my own choice. But wait lemme explain more. It goes deeper than just not valuing false things. Sometimes we even push hate with the thoughts we believe telling us it’s okay because “they” were hateful towards us first.

We’re mostly unknowledgeable of ways to stop making choices and decisions that inevitably make our own lives suffer. In turn, we only see sorrow surrounding and do not believe a beautiful life can exist, let alone even happen for us. Though if we can see some people here in this reality live very beautiful lives, we know it’s possible. It also depends what we think beauty is, and we must grasp love properly in order to possibly see we can achieve this joy as well. Because beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and what you think a “beautiful life” looks like, may be focused upon physical or visual attractions and possessions. And that’s a very dark view of beauty. A blinded view. And when you can’t know that you don’t know that you can ‘not’ see, you won’t know that you’re blind. Especially if you believe we’re all helplessly blind, and nothing matters, or no one matters to your mind because a beautiful life to one with this way of thinking, only seeing with physical eyes, will look for comforts and riches, laziness and ease. Non work. Thinking the rich whom no longer “have to work” are those with beautiful lives.

Once again, ones view of a beautiful life vs another’s view and opinion, is going to be based upon a chosen set of beliefs. Though society leads everyone, we each choose whom we serve daily and someone who has chosen to die within the dark glob of hateful blindness to love, works to maintain a completely taken over mind, and has fully succumbed to accepting that goodness is badness and now they think the dark, IS THE LIGHT.


I recognize many people with this taken over mind frame, often blame God for their lives without even having a slight thought that their unhappiness or lack of joy could possibly be from their own decisions, not realizing even the tiniest of decision weighs upon us daily. Holding us down. Keeping us in the dark. But we must recognize God is still with us even in that darkness, he is here always. Attempting at all moments to influence our sight once again.

Even psychopaths whom have no emotions, are taught what love is by actions. That’s why most psychopaths become murderers if abused; they become what is impressed into them. Whereas a person with emotions can become damaged but not end up wanting to impose it onto another. Even still some psychopaths become politicians whom seem to want to help organize the world based upon separating out the dangerously negative people into prisons which are supposed to help them learn to see, somehow. But just like regular people, politicians can be just as murderous and most are allowing the privatizing and capitalizing on, of prisoners and their ill behaviors and actions towards others.

It’s all a spiraling dark vortex of non-loving interactions and I don’t agree with the treatment of people in prisons and suggest we begin to change or we’ll continue the cycles of abuse which currently exist. Although I trust in the possibility of goodness within I understand God has perfect filters that kick in after death for the soul. Hence the greediest people wishing to escape death, won't. So prisons aren’t the most important aspect of stopping these kinds of behaviors. And “justice” is something we can understand.

The courts and such do not serve us justice, they simply separate those whom fall within the boundaries of their own created rules, and some of those rules appear to protect SOME people but at the same time they can hurt innocent people while sweeping up the “guilty” ones. Which makes it an obviously flawed system of capitalizing off of sins. So we need to face this system is not perfect and continue working to evolve its positive intentions. Remembering always not to allow for obvious negative actions to become the law of your society because that only brings more self-destruction and divided people, locked together. By standing for love we naturally stand and work against the opposite of it.

To know what your work truly is, starts with how you understand ‘God in action’ because there are some people who think God is not here BUT COMING BACK or that he IS destruction and hatred for those deemed guilty by their shared views of unforgivable actions. This thought process leaves one living in a 'hell type view' of this place and unable to fully accept the blessings others can bestow upon them with Love. Because they believe it’s gone and we are living in hell or they hope for hell upon others for many different unloving reasons. And like themselves, they think they live in hell and that this place, this reality, belongs to hatred. But it doesn’t, because it belongs to those of us who work to shine a loving light upon the darkness of the shadows people cast upon each other with their actions or non-actions.

Non action or the refusal to help others, ie. “indifference”, is just as hateful an action.

I can’t help but see that so many people generally have good intentions but backwards practices which do not make sense yet they haven’t the urge or desire to change those things about themselves let alone beginning to change how they see things. Preferring to see that others are doing wrong and need to change. They, or should I say ‘we’, do not stumble upon backwards ways of thinking, we are taught with words and actions. We also teach ourselves after childhood is over via soft programing. Whom we have become shows up when we trip and fall ungracefully. Awareness of ourselves becomes trust in our decision making abilities. Knowing right from wrong, and that you are correct in your views.

When we see people or races claiming to be exceptionally “Godly,” even placing within their own societal mind, that they are “God’s chosen people,” we will not deny what we see because truly God’s chosen people are those with the least possessions, the most persecuted, and made to feel the worst. Yet still maintaining the worshipful attitude and behavioral practices of being kind to others and forgiving others as well. Because that’s love. We must remember why thoughts shape feelings and beliefs shape our actions. Dr. Herbert Benson wrote a book called, ‘Timeless healing, the Power and Biology of Belief,” and when I read this quote below, my spirit jumped with joy in knowing these words can encourage so many people out of every single view of hopelessness and negative thoughts or positions in life.

“Some patients, though conscious that their condition is perilous, recover their health, simply through their contentment with the goodness of the physician.” Page 35

You see, it all falls under the thought of what ‘trust’ truly is. It’s the most important piece of gaining peace of mind, heart and soul. Trust is what keeps us going. Trust in ourselves can save our lives. We must also remember that calling ourselves by a religious title or even maintaining a specific ritual of habits, will not mean you are closer to God than another whom might happen to prefer to not call themselves by a religious title, or go to a church or practice the same habits. God IS in everyone, some just know it more than others. Those that know something you may not know, should be listened to and respected, and if we feel anger forming within and start wanting to not hear what’s being said or the initial feelings stirred up are negative ones, that’s called Cognitive Dissonance.

It’s what happens when you cannot be okay with others opinions differing from you or your opinions. Some become angry because anger is a resulting emotion of not wanting to be seen in comparison to whatever light is being shone on them, and we all know practicing hiding anything at any time, is a practice of doing what we KNOW to be wrong. Words and how we choose to believe, are extensively important to us and our psyche. To our development of understanding what things are good and what are ‘evil’.

Love is sacrifice. It's an action of literally killing the old self and putting the new self aside. However some believe they should commit suicide in order to be a kind person. Believing hateful thoughts from the mind saying, “you’re horrible, no one loves you, you’re a problem for everyone, this is never going to get better, kill yourself because that would be best for everyone.” Right? Wrong!! Allow me to further explain. Just as a public school teacher must have a plan in order to assure success of teaching, so has God a lesson plan for each of us in each of our respective lives.

After going through so many issues and problems with just about everything, I came up with a process I follow when feeling super upset about having to face something I did.

(First) step, acceptance. Admittance to myself I did wrong and even if I think I wasn’t the one who’s in the wrong, I’m here in this, and somehow I must get through it or die.

(Second step) Accept the need for this lesson.

(Third) Plan out the approach for living through the consequences of said lesson.

(Fourth) Identify the pain and fear but do not become a part of it, allow it to flow past. Cry if needed. Speak out loud. Stop feeling like we’re going to die in this:

Identify the coming consequences and envision how to live through them. See ourselves accepting them and work through them. Recognize ‘self’ in the equation. Change from the old ways which put us in need of the lesson in the first place. Trust in what we know about how Love is molding us in reality and then take a deep breath, and remind ourselves WE are an agent of God and move forward. Talking to him about our feelings at all times.

(Fifth) The Test – Clean yourself up, and begin walking with the new you who now knows way more than before.

(Sixth) The confirmation – Knowing who you are is trusting you walk in Love.

(Seventh) The practice, now go forward into your life and apply all you’ve learned – Be humble

From this break down, I know no matter how bad things can get, no matter how much they truly hurt, I must trust in the lesson plan because if what I want is to learn, then learn I shall indeed. And I want to learn to be more understanding when I see problems so that I can do my best at approaching and presenting possible solutions.

I was lying in bed one day, telling my middle daughter how scared I was of the future because as much as I hate lies and lying, I had lied about a few things in fear of possible outcomes from telling the truth, and so I knew that my suffering was in fact a cause of my inability to trust in Truth and so I chose… to lie. And now I have to go through this lesson and its consequences and face the reality I laid out for myself, and its freaking scary man. I was really afraid of what will come of it, because I felt I’d basically taken my armor of truth off, and left my entire soul exposed to the terrifying darkness within reality, and this fear I was experiencing came because I chose, to NOT trust in God.

She told me that it sounded like I was going through a car wash, and suddenly I envisioned this whole process and started describing to her my view of her analogy:

So imagine, that in life, everyone is driving inside cars. Our bodies are our cars. And with us here is an ancient knowledge of a “Love spirit,” whom will literally drive the car for us if we want it to. This spirit of love was here as a human man for a short time, so most people refer to “it” as “him,” and he is known as, Jesus. Now, if I won’t choose to also know this knowledge and so refuse to let Jesus drive, and instead say, “No Jesus (truth), I got this, I’ll drive myself to where I need to go.” I’m choosing to drive myself head first, straight off the side of the road. Off HIS desired path for me. And when I do this, I will always end up getting all kinds of dirt and filth on and within my car in the process. Getting into accidents, caught in ditches etcetera. The fact is, I’m all banged up and end up stuck on the side of the road crying because I’m afraid, until again he reminds me to just, let him drive.

But once he drives me, he first has to take me through the car wash to get all the filth off, and I have to pay for that wash. And to my sad desperate, fearful mind, the wash symbolizes my consequences, unavoidable but then he reminds me that he already paid for me and there’s actually nothing to worry about, “let’s just get going,” and so I get out of the driver’s seat and he begins driving me again.

Does that mean as long as I invite the spirit of love back into my life I won’t have to face any consequences of what I’ve done to myself when I decided to take the wheel? No. It just means I won’t be alone through the whole process of learning how he will get me out and clean me up and strengthened by the forgiveness of my own faults. He helps me to forgive myself. This is why I need to make sure to just let him drive me always, because every single time I decide ill drive myself and do what I want, I’ll come to find my driving capabilities on this ‘highway of life’, are nothing compared to the one whom created the highway in the first place. And if I won’t choose wisely and look to him to drive me, the sadness I feel when facing my children were in the back seat of my car the whole time and my detour hurt them too, and now they must too see the pain and too suffer from my choices to do as I wanted vs. what Love would want me to do, will mold me into a humbled individual going through the car wash again and again.