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The Way of The Masseuse - B

Updated: Aug 7, 2023

Mental Massage


In 2016, I missed doing my work so much after having my baby, that when I finally returned it was with a newly evolved frame of mind. Learning how to form bonds with clients, it was during this time that I began formulating the Master Formula of “The Way of The Masseuse” massage technique. I look back and remember all the people I gave less than exemplary massage work to and must forgive myself for not doing my very best work. For not being my truest self.


I learned that self-discipline is key even when I’m exhausted or working through pain at some level. I demand and command and push this body to render dedicated work. I’ve learned to stay ready in the way that I can respond to people in the best possible manner to hopefully benefit them. Remembering my life goal to remain loyal to God’s commandment to “Love one another”. My views are molded by a strategic and unbelievably powerful force called self-awareness. Some do not believe they have the same force or that this force doesn’t care about them, and that’s a scary thought.


But more, I think people are simply jaded by the misuse and perversion of specific words or the idea of what “service” really means. The words we use maintain meaning with regards to many aspects and can be misunderstood at any moment. So, forgive the past and renew you and your mind. It’s strong yet can also become your own enemy at times. So, love it for what it is, but don’t be afraid of what it might be or how it might control your actions. Be resilient in the knowledge that it was created for YOUR ‘greater good’ and to serve the goodness within YOU.


Because YOU are so important to all of US who are here with you. DO NOT become one of the people who no longer feel things or cares about things the way a healthy minded individual does. I speak from experience. I was once the undisciplined, under achiever, weak in my undefined purpose. Uninspired, unhappy with myself and un-goal oriented. Often uncertain, which reflected in my life habits of changing jobs and relationships. Never finishing my projects. I was very successful at failing partially or just falling short.


It all depends on what you believe “success” to be.


We each must stop looking for the ‘quick fix’ and be ready to work harder and choose to maintain a higher level of self-discipline and self-control. Practice seeing what you know is loving and maintain a want for making those things become reality. Work towards changing the things you can change to be better, and you’ll grow in love and harmony with that spirit.


Be an achiever and refuse to identify with accepting failure! Because failure only happens when you stop working toward the goal. Even moving a small inch IS progress. Stop dwelling in the failed past. Don’t convince yourself that you’re still the same old you, as you once were, in that old seed laying field of failed growth. Know you have changed even if only in the tiniest way. Be practical and methodical by assessing your goals one by one, then pull toward yourself a small piece of work to devour with confidence and focus. Self-discipline is a choice, so choose to use it. Don’t start out by trying to run a marathon after being a smoker for 20 years, start easy, with small goals to accomplish. This way, you’re guaranteed to finish what you begin and then move onto bigger goals. Eventually you’ll grow into the daily habit of living with purpose and achievement.


The only difference between you and those times when you look down upon yourself, is your resulting beliefs. Believe you can’t fail if you walk knowing you create ways for those things that seem unpractical, to become possible. Focus your attention. Sacrifice your comfort via resisting the want to be acceptable vs. phenomenal. Push your ‘need for rest’ out just a little further, know that eventually when you do relax it’s gonna be very well deserved. TV time, leisure, and chill zones are rewards for short periods of ease and recuperation. Use these small things as your first rewards of positive immediate satisfaction from having been disciplined.


Develop your patience. IT is THE foundation to self-discipline. Accept that you won’t give up. Not ever. This is true commitment, like a marriage. But towards your goals. Be good to yourself, speak kindly to your inner child, remember that you are your own parent and be the parent you’d want to know is raising your very own child. Being you and loving yourself is a commitment both necessary and detrimental. Accomplishment takes time. Time is your friend so be willing to wait. Do not waste your time though. However, do give yourself some breaks on occasions. Do not give up, learn to be relentless and very stubborn. Always get back to work and don’t look back. See it and forgive yourself for it. Bandage and you’ll recover from it in time.

Work a little harder this time to make up for anything. Let the difficulty of your past occurrences be the things that you love and appreciate by seeing them as the weights you now utilize to train your most useful mental muscles. The mind of a disciplined person is different from that of the failing person who accepts misery where they are, instead of seeing their surroundings as the place to “come up out from.” Begin to be uncomfortable in that usual comfort zone. Become excited to learn how to implement your thoughts and actions in becoming better, becoming the best you have ever been on a steady path of growth towards your ideal self.


Because ‘success’ is knowing you are getting better daily. You got this!



The greatest part of massage is artistry. Art is like religion has always been… personal. Not everyone can value a specific “piece” or part of a piece of art. But the existence of the piece’s importance is usually based upon personal beliefs, weighed, or valued in the eyes of the beholder. You become the scale. The way you value anything will rise and peak through having personal knowledge OF or TO, the artist. Love is art. But one must believe in “truth AND love” to practice the daily conquering of all forms of hatred, starting from within. Working to not become one with it nor serve it to another on a sad platter is a much-needed work to do.


Hatred is like a seeping, moving glob of dark destruction and if it touches you rendering weakness in your stance of living in love and truth, it’ll overtake your mind and body. And blind obedience to IT will ensue. Making you hurt yourself and others in many clever ways. The path is wide tremendous and its favorite way to destroy, is to make you hurt those you love the most and then keep them away from you by making you keep yourself away from them. Self-isolation can become a form of self-abuse rapidly when used for purposes based in fear, anger, or covetousness.


But to see this truth clearly, one must hold an image of an idea of an “all Loving being”, in the mind. A bases for comparison.


Kind of in the same way that we must each individually decide upon the importance of a piece of art, beyond the dependence of another stating that it holds such and such value. Because another’s idea of value is just as unguaranteed as another’s idea of success and it’s not uniquely yours. Which would mean your personal relationship with “it”, is dependent upon another’s view. In this way, we can know the value because it’s all in how YOU hold it.


Many people hold religion and all its known practices, words and or actions, as a part of their lives. They may or may not live completely in replication to its level of “discipline”. But they do follow in that direction, attempting to think and act as they believe demonstrates this conviction. This can bring about many positive practices because our beliefs are the core power to who we are and will become. Respect for another’s beliefs fills us with gentility and peace for those who practice the teachings of aspects of religions we may not understand or agree with.


This practiced view allows us to love people regardless of our personal views or differing value systems. I can appreciate who people are, not who they want to be like. In my observation on the behavior of people via personal interaction, pass by interpretations, documentaries, public television, radio shows etc., as well as my own life experiences, I notice some people valuing negative things. Fallible things. But that doesn’t have to have the power to stop us from being who we are and choosing to respect ourselves and others.


It's worth explaining that worship of a fallible god is a practice of using your existence in a false way and will only push your existence backwards and away from joy, peace, and happiness. Obey Love because it won’t render outcomes of fear, pain, imprisonment, control, or slavery. Though I’m happy to belong to God, it is always my own choice. But allow me to explain further. It goes deeper than misplaced value for superficial things. An undisciplined mind will return hate with the thought that “it’s okay because THEY were hateful towards us first”. And this practice will always render our lives to be esteemed with suffering and confusion. In turn, we can only see sorrow surrounding us and then we become handicapped to the ability to believe a beautiful life can exist, let alone happen for us or to us.


But when we can see people here in this reality who live very beautiful lives, we know it’s possible. Though it all depends on what we think beauty is. And we must grasp love properly to possibly see that we can achieve joy as well. Because beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and what you think a “beautiful life” looks like, may be focused upon physical or visual attractions and possessions. And that’s a very dark view of beauty. A blinded view. And when you can’t know that you don’t know that you can ‘not’ see, you won’t know that you’re blind.


Especially if you believe we’re all helplessly mislead and nothing matters or no one matters to your mind because a beautiful life to one with this way of thinking, only seeing with physical eyes, will look for comforts and riches, laziness, and ease. Non-work. Thinking the rich whom no longer “have to work” are those with beautiful lives.


Once again, one’s view of a beautiful life vs another’s view and opinion, is going to be based upon a chosen set of beliefs.


Though society leads everyone, we each choose whom we serve daily and someone who has chosen to die within the dark glob of hateful blindness to love, works to maintain a completely taken over mind and has fully succumbed to accepting that goodness is badness and now they think the dark, IS THE LIGHT. They see all thing backwards.


I recognize many people with this taken over mind frame, often blame God for their lives without even having a slight thought that their unhappiness or lack of joy could possibly be from their daily decisions. Not realizing even, the tiniest of decisions weighs upon us daily. Holding us down, keeping us in the dark. But we must recognize God is still with us even in that darkness, he is here always. Attempting at all moments to influence our sight once again.


See, our true work starts with understanding ‘Love in action’, because there are some people who think Love/God is not here but COMING BACK or that he IS destruction and hatred for those deemed guilty by their shared views of unforgivable actions. This thought process leaves one living in a 'hell type view' of this place and unable to fully accept the blessings others can bestow upon them while we are here. Hoping for hell upon others for many different reasons won’t ease the pain of anything. It won’t clear a path to the knowledge of your purpose in this existence. Thinking you live in hell and that this existence, this reality, belongs to hatred, is a mental trap.


Be free in the knowledge that many of us here who work to shine a loving light upon the darkness of the shadows people cast upon each other with their actions or non-actions, won’t give up.

Non action or the refusal to help others i.e., “indifference”, is just as hateful an action. I can’t help but observe how often many people believe their intentions to be good and wholesome when they are not. Who we’ve become shows up when we trip and fall ungracefully. Awareness of ourselves becomes trust in our decision-making abilities. Knowing right from wrong and that you are correct in your views can bring colossal levels of confidence resulting in joy for your life. The societal mind believes “God’s chosen people,” means anything other than “meant to serve”. God’s chosen people are those with the least possessions, the most persecuted, and made to feel the worst. Yet still maintaining the worshipful attitude and behavioral practices of being kind to others and forgiving others as well. That’s love.


We must remember why thoughts shape feelings and beliefs shape our actions. Dr. Herbert Benson wrote a book called, ‘Timeless healing, the Power and Biology of Belief”. And when I read this quote below, my spirit jumped with joy in knowing these words can encourage so many people out of every single view of hopelessness and negative thoughts or positions in life.

“Some patients, though conscious that their condition is perilous, recover their health, simply through their contentment with the goodness of the physician.” Page 35


You see, it all falls under the thought of what ‘trust’ truly is. It’s the most important piece of gaining peace of mind, heart, and soul. Trust is what keeps us going. Trust in ourselves can save our lives. We must also remember God IS IN everyone. Some just know it more than others. Those that know something you may not know, should be listened to and respected. And if we feel anger forming and start wanting to not hear what’s being said or the initial feelings stirred up are negative ones, that’s generally called Cognitive Dissonance. It’s what happens when you cannot be okay with others’ opinions differing from your opinions.


And still some will always practice doing what is known to be wrong regardless.


Words and how we choose to believe, are extensively important to us and our psyche. To our development of understanding things as being either ‘good or evil’. If you’re wondering, there’s nothing to know about loves opposite, it’s void. Love is sacrifice. It's an action of literally killing the old self and putting the new self to work.


After going through so many issues and problems with just about everything, I came up with a process I follow when feeling super upset about having to face consequences or difficult times.


(First step) Acceptance. Admittance to myself that I did wrong and even if I think I wasn’t the one who’s in the wrong, I’m here in this, and somehow, I must get through it, so it won’t get through me.

(Second) Accept the need for this lesson.

(Third) Plan out the approach for living through the consequences of said lesson.

(Fourth) Identify the pain and fear but do not become a part of it. Allow it to flow past. Cry if needed. Speak out loud. Stop feeling like we’re going to die in this:


Identify the coming difficulty and envision how to live through it. See ourselves, accept it and work through it. Recognize ‘self’ in the equation. Change from the old ways which put us in need of the lesson in the first place. Trust in what we know about how Love is molding us and then take a deep breath and remind ourselves WE are an agent of God and move forward. Always praying about our feelings.

(Fifth) The Test – Clean yourself up and begin walking with the new you who now knows way more than before.

(Sixth) The confirmation – Know who you are, trust that you walk in Love.

(Seventh) The practice, now go forward into your life and apply all you’ve learned – Be humble.


From this break down, I know no matter how bad things can get, no matter how much they truly hurt, I must trust in the lesson plan because if what I want is to learn, then learn I shall indeed. And I want to learn to be more understanding when I see problems so that I can do my best at approaching and presenting possible solutions.


I finally realize why our outlooks are so imperative to our day-to-day interactions, approaches, and choices. While some may choose to launch attacks or bombs at us, we choose to prepare by caring enough to, “tread lightly.” This action is in preparation for loving without conditions, the way God wants us to Love. One step at a time. People may or may not know they are attacking you, but being ready is the key to being able to withstand those occurrences. We can literally come out of attacks unscathed.


This applies greatly to our work fields, careers and family life. For me, in my work field, the most amazing Masseur can give their very best to an unappreciative person whose aim is to find things to not enjoy during the session and yet that person probably treats life in the same approach. But I won’t absolutely know that for sure, so I’d have to simply respond without being offended or taking their inability personally and know that how I respond to them is completely MY response-ability.


I’m not here to test their abilities, I’m here to train mine. So, I simply need to keep this in mind and have complete trust in my work, by knowing my approach is always filled with care, and take this opportunity to demonstrate how I can remain focused in the face of this negativity. In the face of this attack, I can think behind it and see with compassion instead of annoyance or anger. This practice of doing my very best keeps me knowing my work is always good, sheltering me from self-doubt.


When I know me and what I practice, I know others and what they practice, thereby making my response to people correctly measured. This is why massage is an aspect of life, necessary for a life of service not luxury. For how can touch be reserved for those with money to pay for it. Like if nurturing things of God are luxuries only for those with much? They’re not. I know I have a lot to give so I can give much and those with much should give or commit to greed and waste away in it.


Humans not only need touch, but we also crave it. Do you know the word “of,” means, connecting value one whole to another?


It’s the “Connector relationship.” The complete fulfillment OF a necessary AND healthy relationship. If a single word with only two letters can represent the very element and only way in which one completes another, it should be obvious that it can be removed and the two words it connects, continues to make sense as to what they are to “do” with each other. Strengthening the relationship quality.


Massage, when viewed properly, is generally ‘the glue’ that holds the aspect of sanity together with self-care. Have you ever wondered what makes ‘crazy glue’ crazy? Or how the reasoning of “crazy,” is being depicted as 'strong' in this term? Meaning if an individual’s mind and behavior can be referenced to as ‘crazy’, in a negative essence, such as to be violent, unbalanced, or unhealthy minded, then WE are the ‘crazy glue’, to ourselves? It means crazy is necessary and so exists for a positive reasoning. Changing your view can transform your ability to access the gate of relief from strenuous tension and pain. We are the crazy glue holding our ‘minds lives’ together with ourselves and our very own spirit. But used against another or pushed out onto others is when it turns negative. Control is the key. Because crazy is good, when properly applied.


I often find myself reflecting, sitting at my minds table, working to achieve a strong, loving, and knowledgeable attitude and ability to respond to all negative situations or people, with thoughtfulness and weighing all the necessities of words and proper gestures against understanding truth in application to my life. Maintaining an ability to reassure myself that I have made another great effort to not respond in negativity nor take their negativity into myself.


However, this reflection reminds me that if I choose to avoid this process of patience, I am only leading myself down or out and away from that uppity feeling of optimism and those much-needed views of beauty amongst the darkness that shadows and decays our truest eyes via spiritual stagnation.


It’s so very close, always, right outside the door, knocking, beckoning us to just follow “it,” or jump quickly, without thought or consideration for if we’re being loving or not. Though even the choice to avoid can become a good thing, because it reminds us of where we are and to BE CARE full always, we must be disciplined in our response manners.


Maybe your opponent, this challenger who beckons you to open that hasty door, has just been having a bad day or may have been thinking or speaking negatively to themselves becoming familiar with creating walls of definitive self-dislike, and so they use those walls to enclose themselves into a cocoon of misery. You’ll feel urged to dislike them because they dislike themselves and you will feel it! But hold fast! Keep focus of the goal to walk in love regardless of any unloving situation or treatment present. Kindness is an ability, a power. So, the inability to be kind naturally forces us to cast a heavy shadow upon others by pretending to “let things go”, when really, you don’t. This kind of negative daily practice, creates false happiness, destroying the healthy desire to BE love. Rendering us feeling a want to see others miserable and unhappy. Not able to understand why happy people are annoying i.e., jealous of another’s joy.


False happiness is the smile upon a killer’s face.


It began with choices in very small increments. Understand, the ability to make that choice is the truest example for why we are allowed to choose. For if you could not possess the ability to choose the negatively false thing, you’d simply be a prisoner of the positive. But it’s not positive to enslave another and this is exactly why we’re ‘allowed’, to choose to bring about bad things which can occur in our lives. This is the exact reason “evil,” exists and we maintain the knowledge of it. The knowledge of good and evil.


It perfectly identifies the opposite, which is goodness, giving US the power to know for sure that we are NOT, I repeat NOT imprisoned to God or Life. We have freedom no matter where we are or what we are involved with. Freedom is a spiritual thing first and foremost.


We choose life daily. It would greatly benefit your thinking to stop thinking that you are in a prison. Fight that negative thought because this place is a battlefield but we’re able to fight for the right side, the Love side. And on this side, we can experience more than a war in existence, we can start over again with a new mind capable of viewing the battle itself as our necessary duty to help people. To love people away from the clutches OF hatred. To serve each other. To serve people, even when they’re annoying or dumb or behaving in an evil way.


People are everywhere. There’s no getting away from them. There’s even one walking with you right now!


You!! And sometimes you may think ‘you’ are “it,” but you’re not. I promise. You’re just {with} ‘it’. You are not a body you are a spirit occupying a body for the time being and yes at times it’s hard to deal with “it,” just about as much as it’s difficult to deal with the ones that belong to others. Minds are a part of those bodies too. Remember, the clever little beast of a thing called “the mind,” indeed maintains a want, and “it” wants and has ways of troubling you and me, with that thing it uses to push thoughts and fears into us and even lies to us because “it,” is the brain.


But just like ‘crazy’ can be used for good, so can your brain. So, YOU must maintain complete control over it. Or it may in fact control you and suffering shall ensue. Losing control over the mind is comparable to a gradual binding and tying like that of a self-tightening knot, which strengthens its grip with every little movement. This is why the things of spiritual teachings can feel like a psychological feat for comprehending.


YOU are a being oftime. Bound to it only… for a time.


It's an abundant work to pull at the strings tied down too strongly, and sometimes it’s hard to see. Our brains want to attain riches and live lavishly, with much sparkle to surround us with the goals of convincing us this reality is all there is to existence. But your spirit knows you’re here to work. And sparkles… are not profound.


You exist because you are greatly needed. Serve others and help them too. That’s profound.


Be careful because that mind of yours, knows we can’t help another very much if we can’t first figure out why we should do such a thing and how such actions are extremely imperative to our day to day lives. Sometimes “it” can make us think a life view of “self-service,” is good, but first it argues us into agreement with that thought, then motivates our actions or non-action. Making us think a life of service to others is negative or counterproductive and even mighty stupid or foolish. We look around at others for an example to see why they live the way they do and from the outside they may seem to “have,” so much, and therefore must be happy. But our eyes lie to us.


Again, those silly little eyes can’t see the importance of spiritual understandings because they’re just fallible eyes capable of losing their very purpose. Which is to serve us so that we can in turn serve others. Still, many trust only in those eyes and ears which barely translate the things of this physical reality.


Many people only believe what they see and hear with their physical bodies and physical minds. However, all of life and what we each give and or take from it, is orchestrated by how we view and approach each aspect of life in general. And that starts in the mind, which is invisible to the eyes. Even though thoughts can be seen in actions and facial expressions indicate those thoughts, the thoughts exist outside of physical matter. Basically put, what we believe, determines our views just as much as what we accept as a fact containing physical evidence, determines our understandings about our surroundings.


My life experience leads me to understand “belief,” is the stance we keep, along with the acceptance of others standing against it. Regardless, if others may or may not agree with your beliefs, those beliefs belong to YOU for YOUR self-empowerment. When there’s something you can’t understand that someone else claims to understand. It’s easy to feel disbelief in their abilities but, maybe it’s first because you refuse to accept the fact that others can understand things your mind may be limited to. Maybe you’re not the most spiritual in existence. Maybe you have something to learn.


So, make sure to respond in Love, because you’re always walking in the right direction with the right sight when you do.


To be honest with ourselves requires a dedication to truth. A life of practicing truth is the only way to know if you are in fact telling yourself the truth about having truly and fully attempted to understand the subjects of spirit. For how can you know if you’re always telling yourself the truth, if you often practice telling lies to others? To lie to yourself can only mean you led yourself down. So, choose to stop now. Stop listening to negative things and instead respond with love by invoking love. Creating love towards yourself first.


Belief is acceptance. Acceptance of truth.


So many people are currently in denial of numerous truths and though we understand denial only leads to a broken mind, we must be patient with them. They most likely deny the fact of this one singular TRUTH. That to practice denial and to live in denial requires repetition of an untruth. Deny, deny, deny. Insanity is to do the same thing repeatedly, expecting a different result. Meaning, if you constantly deny the truth as being lies waiting for the lies to become true, you’ll die with them. Because those lies became your truth, and your inability to know, to divide properly or hear wisdom, is who you have become. Unable. Incapable. Disabled. Yet capable people are those who can be wise and should be leaders. Not disabled people consumed in greed and lusts of the flesh and mind.


Helping people understand the truth of God brings happier lives through stronger minds which can handle the hard to face truths. A strong mind is a mind OF God, a mind OF truth because lies created by you hurt you and others. But God never wants to hurt you. God is Love.


I used to struggle with my acceptance of government structures I engage with daily, yet do not understand. Like taxes or military. Nevertheless, I now accept I do not understand them. Though I DO understand the consequence of not participating with them, which will mean I won’t be able to work and pay for myself and my children and those I want to heal. Because they’re all within these structures.

So, when I say, “I Have to Stay”. I mean I’m not going to run away or try to live outside of it all. I must share my views and opinions on how we can, as a people, change this thing we engage with daily and simultaneously accept the things we cannot change because we care.



Spirit Connects


While massaging, nothing really matters

The euphoric music guides n’ flows

These hands and elbows glide and fly,

Ignoring those inevitable life stresses

I make them wait outside, though they beckon to become one with me,

Urging me to let them in,

And I see their importance but refuse,

Because I’m serving and focused on it

reserve in time and so I’m here to fulfill my Duty,

No matter how elaborate my thoughts

This, is my Super Not Secret Service power

In work mode and I will not falter

I will not allow pain to alter my healing light.

This love giving time, Is time for them.

Because God sent them to me

And so, I must recognize that I am here for them.

For their needs

They… are my priority.

Thank God for my work, this ability to give.

This ability to know why I want to give.











Internal Healing


Healing the body is pointless when we do not understand our first problem down to the source and roots. The internal state of mind, emotions, and spirit. These aspects of who we are, maintain the ability to destroy us from the inside out. Remember, the brain is the cleverest animal. But we aren’t animals, we just live within one.


Look, we are mighty life force beings living inside weak vessels with a power switch board, called “mind”. Also known as “YOUR MIND”. And for some, it’s looking to make them think terrible things about themselves and or others. The mind is a flesh of repetition however, which we guide with our tiny moment-based choices to be imprinted upon by outside forces or to sit in the captain’s control chair and clearly walk in demonstration of what our purpose IS to DO while we ARE here. But we must first know why we do what we do. Then our practices become instantaneous habits.


Auto pilot is a real thing! And some minds can flip and render obedience and worship of the self or indifference for the existence of exceptionality of service to others. Removing itself as the true power and dictator of one’s entire expression to being but a slave of circumstance. Because only outward service truly demonstrates internal peace with being obedient to creating love within another.


Therefore, sometimes, for some people, this thing called “mind” is working hard to create ways to trick them and make them think “they” are “it”. So, I say fight to get knowledge of who you are. Stand strong in self-knowledge that you are not a simple and controllable being. And neither is another. We ALL have a natural desire to walk in our truest form. Only in this form can any one of us have all that power within our grasp.


Because what’s looked upon correctly can help us change our destination. But the future, no matter how possibly short it may be, is still to come. So, prepare for it. Quickly and patiently. Strong and with true strength, but remember that ‘strength of spirit’, appears as weakness to those who are confused about much.

But you aren’t here for their opinions of you. You’re here to serve those who CAN see and receive you!


There are SO many that need you here. And there are many that shall never see or fathom the truth within themselves enough to see yours. But trust, many need your help. You must fight for them and you. Fight to understand how you can help them by first warring to get ahold of your ability to control your behavior. Because the fight is always first within, and this place IS a psychological war. A war of the wits and spirits. A war of ‘truth vs. the lie’.


God created untruth, and it gave us something to choose besides a mechanical “yes” when he asks the ultimate question, “do you trust me”. God is truth and cannot lie, but your brain (the reptile mind - serpent) can. So, WITHIN lays the importance of knowing the difference of being bound to the oneness of God or the illusion of the ailment in life being choice itself. Remember not to forget to remind yourself that you must evoke the truth to stay close to the truth by living in it, surrounding yourself with it. It’s scary sometimes, but don’t worry. God desires to protect you and bring you out of any situation, even the ginormous looking ones. No matter where you end up. He’ll be right there with you.


Death is the end of the work you’re given to do while you’re here and whatever beginning happens after, no matter what people believe, only the truth matters. So, find it and hold your own knowledge of truth which is not an opinion nor a hope. It simply IS.

If you’re still alive right now, take heart, and know you still have a chance to make things right again.


The amount of belief and focus we have about where we go when we die is all going to be based upon choices we make. It holds significant importance because your knowledge equals your actions and how you feel when you die and leave this reality. It’s all connected to how you live and behave in this reality. Being realistic is supposed to be about subjects that exist while we’re here in reality, so let’s talk about those things that can help you while you’re here.


You and God. God is here now. You are here now.


God’s not waiting for you to leave to “go” be with him. No, HE IS here now! With you. Always has been, always shall be.


Throughout all the issues, problems, and inevitably horrible situations I faced, even the ones that I’ve made some pretty sketchy choices within and put myself in some serious pain, have taught me that I can either learn to trust in God and always call on him for all things through all things, or I can wallow in my sorrow and thrash in my pain.


Because love and service are the only way out of all situations that are so dire and scary. And I do not want to ever crawl into that self-strangling bed of self-hatred. Kill that monster within by trusting in your ability to seek for your power to conquer the wrongness within yourself and grow the rightness of living in positivity and love. Service to others.


Get UP!! Go outside and go for a walk!


I sometimes play this game with my daughters when we go for walks. It’s called the “Hi,” game. We say hi and smile at everyone we pass, and if they say hi back or wave, then we won. If not, we laugh a little and keep on strollin. Try and try again until you win. Go help someone. Somehow. Even if just a little. By smiling or saying hi to people, you can do something to help in some way. And no matter if they care or appreciate it, it’s not about them caring, it’s about being thankful to them for being here with you for you to be able to take that opportunity to interact with them or serve them with love in some manner.


Here’s how I see it. I’m thankful for my ability to give to people and so it’s possible that I should feel like it’s because of me that those who end up coming to me, must be here for me to serve because my need is to care and help others. So, perhaps their need is a result of my aspiration to serve. Consequently, I should be thankful for them being in need instead of annoyed or overwhelmed by how many people are in need. This thinking makes my mind shift to viewing others as ‘being’ my charge, not my burden. ‘Being’ my work to be done. And now, I need to do my work and get it done well. And my efforts all begin in my mind. Pay attention to your thoughts.


I often hear my thoughts wanting me to make sure my intentions of a memory or action or words, were loving and not unkind. Sometimes my mind is in rewind mode thinking about situations or conversations, hoping I responded lovingly enough or if I could have been better. My mind now tests me and reminds me to stay on track with the selfless nature of whom I know Jesus, my mentor, to be. That’s why our beliefs are so very important, because they determine how we react and treat others. They do not however determine how people may treat or react back to us, and that’s where I think many people become confused within themselves. “Lost”. Forgetting that not everyone can be grateful or care or even want our help or anything of the sort.


Some people are just miserable and seem to want to be that way. But we must not be moved by it, we must remain who we are and behave the way we know we want to be. In kindness, forgiveness, and love. Clearly identify where ‘the want’ you are following is leading you to, destiny (destination). Stop basing who you are upon who they may be.


If the thoughts within me are mean or hurtful towards someone at any time, I literally say within my head, “Stop it in the name of Jesus.” And I won’t allow those thoughts to strive or live within me. No. Because what we let grow within, sprouts without, and the fruits we pull from that wretched tree can only be poison to ourselves and those around us.


Yet I admit I can falter.


The kingdom of Heaven is within you and the mansion that is set for you to live in, IS a state of mind WHICH EXISTS RIGHT NOW. “The kingdom of heaven” and “God” and all those specific historical words, are about being alive RIGHT NOW and how we must keep our minds, and our reasons as to why we must choose to not be mean or react in a hurtful, unthoughtful way with a clear and tactful intention and approach. No matter if someone has hurt us or not. It’s about setting yourself up with that home in the clouds above all the madness in this lifetime, while we’re here.


Because the idea of “eternity” only resonates with some, but that doesn’t mean it only applies to some. No. Refusal to believe what has been shown to be truth, destroys your internal state slowly and steadily. To see love in others is to be in harmony with yourself. We’re all here together. I’ve learned to apply love to the wounds. Therefore, the wounds are no longer painful to see another suffer from but a necessary work. A source of need for your love. Here because you are here. Here with us. We all must live here together at the same time.


Sometimes in life we just need to clean our “mental mirror” or “turn the lights on,” because often we won’t even notice that the mirror is dirty, or that the room is dim because we’re just so used to not being able to see. It’s all fine and dandy until someone turns, the lights on and you see what you couldn’t see before.


I’d often be doing dishes in the kitchen, when someone would come in saying, “why is it so dark in here, turn on the light.” And they would. And then I’d realize how much better I could see at that moment, but I didn’t even notice that it was slightly dark before those lights were on. Not until I seen the lights go on, did I know how much easier… I could be doing things. I didn’t KNOW how much I couldn’t see until I could see everything in the light.


Sometimes when I’m in such deep turmoil of self-suffering, my faith in God wavers. But the longer I learn to walk with the understanding of making aware choices and that most things are out of my control, and must be accepted, the more my strength in trusting God becomes. Even if I recognize that I’m trying to trust in ‘Gods will’, but inevitably do not and just cannot, inescapably I know, I must. And I’ll be less angry and or disappointed in those moments and then react less attached to the negative emotions of the situation.


In these moments when you or a friend are in a deep-down feeling or loss of any sort, it can bring feelings of wanting to die, trust me. I was there too, and I wrote this for you.


I was sitting in my car at work, crying hard from missing my one-year-old baby and scared as hell that she was being hurt and I wasn’t there to protect her and all I could do was pray. I even reached out to someone I felt was a friend but realized they didn’t really listen. I had to simply do what I know I should. And in my conversation to God, I became calmer and began to write this. For you.



Dear other Me who is in fear,


Please read me if you are in a heavy space in life or in your mind right now. If you’re feeling uneasy and like you can’t control your mind and your watery eyes. Place your eyes on each word that follows behind this one and don’t look away. Okay? Come with me. I’m with you.


I know your hurting right know, and so am I but I want you to just follow these letters as they pass by within your beautiful eyes. Look intently upon this page with your cloudy eyes, just for now, okay? Look, I know the fear is holding you tightly, but don’t look away from this string of words until this letter is complete. Okay? We’re together right now. Take a deep breath and exhale through your mouth.


Wipe away those tears and take three deep breaths and remember that I’m writing this to you while I too am sitting in my own fear. A fear that things won’t get better, and won’t “work out for the best,” as everyone so easily keeps saying is going to happen. I’m really scared that I’m gonna end up in worse pain than now when I get to that place in the future. That decision making moment, the one that seems like it all lays in the hands of another human being’s control and power. Because I feel so powerless and scared right now.


But we’re here together. And I know that I need to get through this to create the opportunity to get these words into your eyes. So, I MUST keep myself from wanting to give up or do something that would leave my future in an even worse possible place than what I’m feeling right now. Know what I mean?


I mean, I’m feeling so desperate right now that I’m having bad and scary thoughts that I know aren’t good at all and I don’t want to stay with them or let them grow inside my mind. So, if this is how you’re feeling too, let’s take our mental broom and sweep that away together, okay? Take another deep breath and slowly exhale and just keep reading.


Just envision the broom and you holding it, sweeping all the painful emotions out of your mind’s doorway. And watch that dust blow away into the wind. Done! We’re getting our control back with each breath.


That was not as hard as I thought it would be. Was it difficult for you?


If yes, keep watching the sweeping of the broom over the dusty floor, in your mind. Your strength shall grow as you watch the dust become less and less.


You are one strong mickey fickey. Serious though. Take a deep breath!


I felt weak and incapable like ten minutes ago, but I feel ready to jump back into reality and even though I want to come in swinging at those who seem at fault for my fear. I know it’s not their fault that I’m experiencing this fear. It’s not mine either though. It’s simply here and so I need to steer clear of this ‘want to blame them’ for where I am. Because even if I was captured and put here. I’m the one who must get out of this space of mind because blaming my captors won’t be time wisely spent on my plan of escape. And I need to focus all my efforts on being strong enough to think my way out. I can do it and so can you!! I know you can too because anything I can do; you can do better!! Theirs a way! I know it.


Let’s force ourselves to smile right now, okay? Even… even… if it feels super fake or forced. Let’s do it together, Okay?


Ready? One, two, three.


Hold it. Hold it. Don’t let it drop. Okay, now rest them cheeks.


Thank you for smiling with me. Hehe. J


One deep breath together. Okay…………... good.


So! The problem was that we were feeling down, scared and what else?


Let’s write those words here and get them out in front of our eyes. If you can’t write right now, just envision the words here. Take a deep breath.



____________________ ______________________ _______________________.



Those are heavy. But remember we’re here together, Okay?


Picture me hugging you right now. A gentle huggie mmmm!!! I’m envisioning these words being a hug for someone out there.


Okay. We are going to find a solution to this, okay? Don’t worry.


This is not unconquerable.


Believe me I feel better already just by thinking that maybe you feel slightly better makes me feel better too. We are literally pulling each other through this right now!! Sheesh, I really was scared. Take a breath.


Thank you for helping me. You’re amazing!!


Now, I’m going to ask you to get ready to start thinking about not following these words here in a few moments, okay?


Not yet though! Pay attention to your breathing.


First, I want us to write down or envision some words that describe a solution or its part, here.




________________________ _______________________ _______________________


I wrote: Remember, I’m not going to be so easily defeated. And. Here to help, must keep going because someone in this world might need my help. And. Focus on my work.


When I’m focused on giving, instead of how I need to get this or that, I am pulled away from thinking too deeply into my own life. Just keep giving, just keep giving, just keep giving, giving, giving. Ha-ha.


Feeling better? A little maybe? I am.


If no. Go back to the beginning of this letter and don’t stop following the words with your eyes until you are calm enough to be in your own mind. Try to memorize all the words.


Make a list of things you look forward to doing and start doing one. Then the next, okay? Give attention to your breath.


I want you to know that you are so important in this world. Take a breath. You are so needed, and you’ll find out how by focusing your attention on outside, not on the pain inside. Work through the pain. I know you can. You are capable. There is an immense power inside you, and you can access it at any time. Trust that, okay? One more deep breath.


I love you so very, very much and many people in the future are waiting for you and have so much love for you too. You can be a time traveler too, don’t give up. Breathe and know who you are.




Sincerely and warmly yours,




Carolina Grace



When I’m Here


I’m not a pleasure-seeking measure.


I’m not a measure of any pleasure.

But my treasure lays in wait


Waiting for eternal fate

Holding back the bite


Though I’ve bitten back

I can know I’m working hard to control.

Though my armor is impenetrable

When it’s on


I just must hold on to it strong.

But my strength comes and goes.

So, my armor waits and knows.

I can’t do my best without it.

That’s my best friendly.


No doubt about it

My sword is.



Here with me




MSP Helping Homes

Both my mom and dad were homeless at one point in their lives so, it’s become a habit of mine to give to those who ask for help. And at this point in my life, I too have experienced being homeless and I observe that many of the people holding signs, that I have helped, seem internally broken and possibly feeling defeated. Their lives reflect this internal state of need. And I believe offering self-improvement classes and self-reflection exercises along with physical treatments can be a strong pull on the appeal to again enjoy life and living. I envision a facility with land space reserved to offer a community of tiny homes and gardens to be cared for by those capable. I see people feeling safe again and I watch their spirits rise.


Residency is by choice of course; the door is always open for guests.


Upon being given an assigned space and some belongings, they’ll then be given a voucher for MSP Donation store where they can pick out clothes, shoes, and all manner of things, free of charge.


Along with classes and workshops to choose from we also host monthly seminars with guest speakers chosen to help motivate and stimulate our visitors. The goal in MSP helping those in need is to not only provide a few nights of food and shelter but to focus on teaching people how to “fish” per say, not just handing them a fish for that day. With this approach we intend to provide self-healing tools along with much needed guidance on how to look internally in a way that they may have never even known could help.


We have hotlines available to go out and pick people up locally when requested. We visit homeless sites and camp outs in teams of workers.


The opportunity to help people through these homes comes from the work we do at “My Spa Paradise”. Our work ethic is what sets us apart. Often people are forced to compromise the level of quality they accept from a massage session based upon ability to pay. However, since we believe “self-care” is a necessary health care, our moto remains, ‘giving is necessity’. Especially when society markets their practice of reserving the best things in life via measuring quality with money. In essence economizing the natural thing of “touch therapy” and then pushing those trampled fruits around as being somehow better if you paid more or get paid more for them. But, when we remove the measure of this world and give our best fruits to all, we see the best fruits are those given and not paid for with anything other than grace.


Currently it’s accepted as normal to maintain a life practice of taking the highest paying positions with the best-looking benefits, which normally leaves one feeling achieved and viewed by most of the world as being the best in your field. But! Remember, sometimes our views are distorted and what may seem to be good right now, may NOT actually be as good as it could be when weighed together with it benefiting “all” vs “just yours”. We must look clearly at whom ‘it’ is we are serving with our decisions. Does it somehow benefit others, or does it only benefit you and yours? Look at the reasons for your decisions instead of accepting those attractive offers so quickly. Check yourself and remember that at “My Spa Paradise” our design is foundation based upon the maintenance of balance with one’s life purpose and chosen work field. Therefore, our complete satisfaction to be givers (employees) and serve (clients/public) is strong.


We need to grow into the understanding that it’s NOT a good outcome for some people to simply not have the means to receive quality work from such talented individuals as ourselves, even though they are quite often the ones in greatest need of our services. Our talent comes from God and is reserved for all who are in need.


Classes and workshop attendance is never mandatory because it’s not a prison. Though the classes are designed specifically from levels of homelessness to more stable levels where someone’s just looking to improve themselves and their approach to life. We focus the beginning stages of attendance at MSP Helping Homes with self-work and chosen areas of working for MSP.


The fact remains that many homeless people are mentally ill and maintain different levels of reactive type personalities. The assessment process for MSP homes enrollment is very detailed and closely monitored for those with a history of such behaviors. The home leaders are individuals with great amounts of training on how to be peacekeepers, house protectors and aid advisors. They are given responsibilities based upon their individual likes and needs.


The goal is not to oust people further for the presence of an ailment, the goal is to demonstrate that we choose to understand their behavior as being the direct result of abuse and internal pain, and our goal is to help them reform and offer loving, decent treatment for betterment and success in life. We simply closely monitor them but from afar so as not to make them feel pushed or with an unreasonable expectation of their stay.

The homes are run by MSP employees and maintained with bonuses though not to be based upon the success and recovery of people who transition throughout these homes. The entirety of each home is teaching self-sufficiency. Based upon the home being utilized with aero-phonics and homesteading models where food grows all around outside and inside of the homes. All water is filtered and stored from rainwater to keep costs of living way down. We offer basic carpenter, mechanics, sowing classes and more. Each home is furnished via this work.


We need to make sure to understand that to care about others is done in action because some people can’t go out and simply give food to the homeless, so through membership with MSP the homeless are now growing food and giving it away for free to anyone in need. These ideas are open to additional add on ideas, for betterment and growth via meetings with the MSP Think Tank group.


Our” Tiny homes” are designed for self-sufficiency, however much more in depth with professional mental health workers and child safety advocates. As these homes are for people in need and their children only. One side of the tiny homes site is for singles and the other for families.


Home Design Ideas:


Singles and families live in each home free of rent, utilities, or food costs. The facility is run by a team of two employees per every 15 homes. Though they don’t work on weekends, a community leader is in charge and oversees their respective areas.


Daily plan of action for beginning recuperation:

7:30 a.m. – Wake-up

8:15 – Breakfast

8:45 – 9:45 Tai Chi/Practice of silent space & being.

9:45 – 10:15 Free time

10:15 – 2:30 p.m. General Education classes (Reading, writing, math)

12:30 – 1:30 Lunch

1:30 – 2:30 General Education continued

2:30 – 3 Free physical activity time

3 – 4 Talk Therapy

4 - 6 Your choice activities, T.V or learning movies included

6 – 7 Dinner

7 – 8 Chores (noise requested to lower to minimal for respect of neighbors)


Activities and electives to choose from:


- Chair Massage

- Musical Instruments/Singing/producing/performing

- Dance

- Art (all creative types including theatre)

- Media and design

- Wood shop

- Mechanics

- Gardening and food growing

- Cooking

And more.


Fridays are “dress crazy fun day” and everyone alters their schedules as wanted. All the other four days start with Zen style wake up music played throughout the day in various areas, but Fridays are reserved for Leisure. On Fridays we hand out surprises, though making sure not to leave anyone out, we make sure to be always considerate of everyone, we practice mindfulness.


The supervisors and monitors work in shifts to teach and put attention to areas in need. This revolutionary community will heal and provide for those who make it work for them. So, let’s get to work!





Chapter: Ideas


Inventors Ring –

Practical Application for daily use and Mass distribution. This ring is convenient for writers, students and anyone who might need to record sound or draw anything at the touch of a button located on the ring on their finger. Computer load compatibility.

Laser push button for mid-air sketching. (Micro machined inertial sensors)

A record button for sound recording. (With noise analysis and characterization)

External data transfer plug – universal.

Buttons must be tapped three consecutive times for purposeful use.

One button has an emergency code which rings out a distinct siren type sound when activated.

Micro Laser (Accelerometer chip) convenient for recording the handwriting mid-air.

Photo tonic Crystal Nano cavity, Silicon Microchip Accelerometry

Insert Picture 1: hand with ring

Picture 2: ring on its own)


Massage Table –

World’s smallest massage table is both convertible and light weight to perform body work very low to the ground. Made from very firm foam, alike to the material inside of automobile car seats. Unfolds from four pieces, has a built-in air suction machine for convenience and expandable upon opening. Has a very small carry case. The legs are convertible to one, two or three feet tall. Convenient for people who need deeper work or work given while sitting on a chair. Also, for the practicing masseurs in a wheelchair.

Insert pictures:

3 – Full table with legs pulled out

4 - Close up of material

5 - Suction machine, built in carry case on bottom of table)


Massage Hands -

With a set of standardized sized silicone molded hands that are attached through the inside the hand to tips of finger, the machine warms sensors in the hands as it massages in differing speeds and movement selections of techniques for different massages needed. Massaging the neck, upper shoulders, or low back. The hands will be affordable. Unlike a massage chair which sells for about $5000 or more, this product will be available for everyone. It should sell for less than $100.


Oil Warming Holster –

A battery compartment will be attached to the bottom of the oil carrying waist section of the holster. The holster is lined with small metal pieces which warm the entire bottle, not just the bottom. The belt of the holster is stronger and more durable than the common ones of today. It has a small, widened area on the back of the belt that can be set to warm the wearers back. That part can be detached if wanted but it all connects to the same battery compartment which can be charged or used with removable batteries.




Face Rest Piece Peace

Most people experience nasal clogging from the face down position of a massage, and most of the time spent during a massage session is face down, but this face rest holder ‘piece’ can be attached to any general face rest holder, which will remove negativity and add enjoyment to all your future massage experiences.


A small square like shape, made with a strong cushion with either leather, mesh, cotton or fleece, holds the forehead from the eyebrow area down the sides of the nose. The piece has springs so the face can move with the massage. It will not block the breathing but create more room to breathe opening the nasal cavity at the same time. This small, inexpensive addition to the face rest holder, will alleviate discomfort and drippage from the nasal cavity. Because the additional piece can be added to any face rest holder, clients can purchase and attach it themselves if the facility does not provide them.


(Picture 1 ‘the peace’ on a face rest connected to a table, Picture 2 ‘the peace’ by itself)


Reality TV Show Ideas:


Idea 1:Travel Show - An interviewer will travel around the world learning many different styles of massage, and basically become the “Anthony Bordain” of massage. Instead of tasting foods we’re trying different forms of touch and healing. Exploring all aspects of holistic care and sharing thoughts on whether they work or not. Hearing stories from locals on how natural things cured them etc. Does cupping, acupressure, acupuncture, and salt stones work? What do other countries do for mental health, physical health, and spiritual health?


Example: Studies show that Mexico, is the most mentally unhealthy due to violence and social unrest. So, we have put together a team of healers to follow around as they set up their massage chair in public places.


Cameras will also follow masseurs conducting interviews with teachers and students alike. Everyone will have a platform to share what they’ve learned with large groups of people. We can also put on a “standing massage” show of how to position or move people to music and make them stretch with specific movements as well as placing someone standing in a large bin, about three inches in height, and perform full body exfoliation treatments.

The point of the show is to share this art with the world and separate it entirely from sexuality but into the healing, medical industry. Bringing the truths of the industry to the forefront.


Idea 2:Games, interviews, and prizes - No more than seven massage therapists from around the world will participate per episode. Experienced masseurs be on the panel of people who will be doing the commentating on the massage work, running the games, and talking to the people. At the same time showing footage of how life is for them in their day-to-day encounters, struggles and joys on this path of the healing arts. Following the lives of all seven participants through their story of attending massage school, home life and how they enjoy their career choice. The show will be centered upon a series of contests with other massage therapists.


All levels of the contests are assessed by paid participants who are massage instructors and will give their opinion in detail as to how the quality of their massage sessions went, with a full description but never about being better than another. Solely based upon your observation of if they gave their best and how.


The contest:


Round 1 – Timed bed making - winner receives massage supplies and spa gift card.

Round 2 – Sit only massaging, participants will administer a relaxation massage while sitting the whole time, must not stand at all - winner receives massage supplies and spa gift card.

Round 3 Final:


Level 1 – Must give 50-minute, full body, deep tissue massage without the ability to see.

Level 2 – Must give 50-minute, full body, relaxation massage using elbows and forearms only, no hands allowed.

Level 3 – Must go through a mini physical challenge course, be yelled at in military training manner, then be rushed in to give a 30-minute, full body, relaxing massage.

Level 4 – Deprived of sleep for 15 hours, must then give an 80-minute relaxation massage, with a 10-minute foot scrub add on toward end of session, and 20-minute energy work.


The goal of these ideas is to bring awareness of the health aspects of self-care. As well to demonstrate the different types of people that are passionate about their work in the massage field and how they are working to heal and help those in need. The point of the show is to open this gift of massage via an industry hijacked by capitalism. Too many people who have yet to experience or feel the life changing effects of receiving massage work, are happily dismissing a wonderful form of healthy medicine for all aspects of life.


Healing begins within the internal state of a person and starts with trust. These shows will catapult our industry in the direction of acceptability and trust worthiness. Normalizing the need for massage as a health necessity and not a simple luxury by making it more competitive and expose the ability to see and feel true quality and care.



Grateful Feeling


Light it up - Tilt the flame -

To do fall - the fall of pain

Everybody was a cold design, feel for the scent of time

But when you’ve gone away, when you do the fates just stay

But can you go away to - Some light

No you’re not that kind - but yet -

You wanted two times

And Steal you and - you steal me

It’s something more OH, You stay out of the way

a - force - you – can’t find

Wait a fan - to feel his sign

But you’d save yourself, you’re filthy -

It’s all defined - when you’re going to freeze

They Give - your life - to - what - you died

Whenever you try they - beat you to the front door

Oh what you gonna deal with, when you your time is here

And dive a feeling in time to go - to face it

Just say always fine, just say always fan, Just say always fine, just say always fan

Getting to know you, Slide it all -

In with your scent of time – In my time you’re feeling in time

Defend your - time - You feel alright

Let me- show - when you show - a way

I'm set when - are we – the same -

All the same –

All tame

Grateful feeling lays - When you’re feeling me

Grateful feeling Lays when you’re feeling me

Grateful feeling lays - When you’re feeling me

Chapter: My Spa Paradise Ministry



Thank you for reading this part 2 of my two-part book. I sincerely hope it gives you some motivation to get up and get to work because no matter what, we are here together, and we gotta help each other.


So much love to you and all whom you love. You got this!





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